Tom Maher
1943-2010
A plaque on the bench at the 12th hole in memory of Tom Maher
Thomas Francis Maher of Ridgefield, an information systems management expert who had been active in the community, died surrounded by his family Thursday, Jan. 28. He was 66 years old and the husband of Ann Nolan Maher. Mr. Maher was born in Brooklyn, N.Y., on April 17, 1943, a son of Mary Whelan Maher and the late Thomas Maher.
He attended St. Augustine's High School and graduated from Fordham University. While at Fordham he completed ROTC and afterwards was commissioned an officer in the U.S. Army, stationed at Fort Leonard Wood, MO. After his military service, Mr. Maher worked in Munich, Germany, for Siemens. Upon his return to this country, he began a career in information systems management and worked for several major companies including INA, Mutual Benefit, MONY and Aegon. Over the past decade, he worked through his own consulting company, TFM Consulting.
Mr. Maher and his family moved to Ridgefield in 1990 from Long Valley, N.J. Over the past 20 years he was active in the community. He coached many basketball, soccer and baseball teams. He was active in Ridgefield Emmaus, served as President of the Mimosa Homeowners Association, and was a member of the Ridgefield Men's Golf Club.
For more than 10 years he volunteered monthly at the Dorothy Day Shelter in Danbury.
"Tom was a man with many interests and hobbies," his family said. "In his earlier years he was an accomplished tennis player and skier and later began snowboarding with his children. He was an avid gardener and skilled carpenter.
He was an avid reader and had a deep love of music." Besides his mother and his wife, Mr. Maher is survived by four children: Thomas and Andrew, both of Brooklyn, N.Y., Elizabeth Maher of San Francisco, Calif., and Desmond Maher of Manhattan, N.Y.; a brother, Peter (and Kathy) Maher of Westfield, N.J.; three sisters, Barbara and Jack) McConville of Port Liberte, N.J., Marcella (and Joe) Freisen of Mountainside, N.J., and Brigid Maher and her husband, Olaf Bjorkman of Brooklyn, N.Y.; a brother in law, Bob Nix of Aspen, Colo.; a sister-in-law, Eileen (and Joe) Sullivan of East Meadow, N.Y., and many nieces and nephews. Besides his father, Mr. Maher was predeceased by a sister, Mary Ellen Nix of Chicago.
Contributions in Mr. Maher's memory may be made to Regional Hospice, Home Care Program, 405 Main Street or to Dorothy Day Hospitality House, 11 Spring Street both of Danbury, CT 06810 to assist them in the outreach programs of service.
Copyright, 2010, The Ridgefield Press. (Used with permission).
A letter to Tom's golfing friends, from Tom’s wife, Ann.
I would like to extend my sincere gratitude for all the expressions of sympathy given to my family over the past week. With Tom's passing I have lost my husband and life's partner, our children have lost their beloved father, and the world has lost a very good man. But I'm also aware of how many people have lost a dear friend, and his friends at the Ridgefield Golf Course can count themselves among his best.
Tom's involvement with golf began many years ago. Somehow, as a young city boy, he made his way onto the course at Fort Hamilton, Brooklyn and there began a lifetime love of the sport. Over the years he played whenever the opportunity presented itself. Then when our children were very young, Tom was selfless enough to put away his clubs for several years. But the call of the game was stronger than a Siren's song and soon enough Tom was golfing again. On our summer vacations, Tom would be up at the crack of dawn to play 18 holes at Montauk Downs and be back to the cottage before anyone stirred. And on a family trip to Ireland in 1997 Tom managed to play 10 rounds of golf in 9 days (that's no typo!), yet again he was thoughtful enough to do this while his family still slept.
As much as Tom loved the sport, it wasn't until we moved to Ridgefield and he became involved in the Men's Club that he found a community of kindred spirits that would eventually become his second family. On the occasions when I was able to play a round of golf with Tom I would observe a transformation take place the minute we stepped onto the course; his whole demeanor changed. This was his territory, a place where worries, aggravations and non-golfers were left behind. He was among friends who loved the sport the same way he did, and all they needed to think about and talk about was golf. It was his Heaven on earth.
I was always touched by the fondness and mutual respect I observed between Tom and the golfers he bumped into. When we would play doubles with the Mastellones or the Pisanos, I was amazed at the generosity of spirit golfers possessed. They were all fierce competitors, including the women, yet they encouraged each other in their game, complimented each others’ good shots and celebrated each others’ wins. Jealousy had no place among these friends. I was told by Tom that all good golfers behave the same way. I feel such respect for the game that gave Tom such pleasure in his life.
You probably know more about Tom's game than I could imagine. You know the holes he loved the best, the dog legs and sand traps that gave him the most trouble, the clubs he preferred, and the money he won. There's probably an eagle that I'm unaware of, or a left handed club resting forever on the bottom of one of the ponds, but I do know that he was a bit of a legend in the Men's Club. Who doesn't have an image of Tom disappearing into the woods and emerging sometime later with a pocket full of lost golf balls? My personal favorite image is of Tom at the first tee, driving the ball with a projectile that seemed to defy gravity.
Tom was first a devoted family man, but his life was made richer by the game of golf and the friendships forged on the golf course. Deep into his illness and long after he had the strength to walk the course or play his normal game, he just wouldn't give up. His love of the game kept him going; for this I can't thank you enough.